No, I am not just a 'vegan'

Labels. They're for clothes, not humans.

I don't reject the label 'vegan', because I love what it stands for. But similarly I don't like being defined as simply that. It creates an image of who I am without any other knowledge of me.

Being a vegan is difficult. I don't just mean it's hard finding vegan food at a restaurant or whatever, in fact that's pretty easy now I'm used to it. What's difficult is hearing people in your life tell you that they think veganism is stupid, or have them question you, often in a derogatory way, asking what you eat, asking if you miss bacon etc. I'm often the subject of jokes, all meant lightheartedly I think, but nonetheless, not something I want.

Vegans are often put into a generic category: hippies who like to moan at meat eaters. This is not true. I cook my omnivore friends bacon. I even touch it with my vegan fingers. I ate meat before, but I wont eat it again. That doesn't mean I think everyone should become a vegan.

I am a vegan because I want to be. It's best for my personal health, because I have extensively researched it and ensured that I am eating the right nutrients etc. I choose to be vegan because I love animals and I don't want to eat them. Now tell me why I deserve to be interrogated for my personal choices when they don't affect anyone else?

I get it. There are the silly vegans who moan about everything and live in a bubble. That's not the majority. There's good and bad everybody, some are more upfront and passionate. Some are also too preachy which I don't agree with. I am just a normal person (well, the normal bit is debatable) who eats a lot of great food and tries to not hurt people or animals. I don't ever preach or moan to others about their eating habits. So why are they doing it to me?

Please, next time you take the piss out of vegans, or ask a vegan where they get their protein, remember that vegans are just people who eat a vegan diet. Not another breed of human. If you don't want a 'vegan' to discuss your eating habits or ask you why you eat meat, then please mind your own business and don't ask me if I miss steak. (I don't, ftr).

The philosophical vegan...

My heart was thumping. Each heartbeat echoed in my ears. My chest had gotten so tight, each breath I drew inward seemed to get trapped in my throat. I could see my heart almost beating out of my chest, and nothing could calm it. 

I didn't know at the time, but I was having a mild panic attack. 

I'm recovering from depression. A long, deep depression, which started many years ago. It flares up occasionally, but this time it stayed. I turned to pills, despite loathing the dependence. But now I'm getting better, with only laughter as my medicine.

I knew it would be a difficult journey, with troubles along the way. A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor, as they say.

But no matter how long you stay in the light, the darkness always comes. 

I had just finished work. The sun was fierce in the late sky.

My phone rang. 

My Mum was crying.

My Dad was very, very ill. 

But pain has many faces.

The tears soon came. Violently. Harshly.

My heart felt like it was about to implode inside me.

You can't pray for the pain to disappear, but you can pray for the strength to get through it.

I guess I always knew a day like this would come, and though I'd never be prepared, surely this was the worst timing? I'd just come off medication for depression - surely I can't handle this?

Everything happens for a reason. 

Everything is temporary; pain, life, time. Holding on to anything too tight only hurts more once it's gone.

Wasting time hating the universe for dealing me this hand in life will not make it any better. The only thing I can do is move forward, accept the past and focus on the now. It's the only way to stay happy. I need to be strong for my family and myself, and I believe I can do this by remaining as balanced as possible and focusing on positivity.

We control our own happiness.

Have a positive day! Namaste xoxo 

London life = the best life

The air tastes sweeter in my favourite places. Summer tastes like the dewdrops on grass in my garden, but London still somehow tastes free. Despite the grey, the pollution, the swirls of graffiti like tattoos across the buildings, London sets me free.

Pangs of excitement surge through me as I weave through Waterloo station, sipping my soy cappuccino through a satisfied smile. I have been here before. I have walked through London many times. Stations, landmarks, tourist areas, all the way through the multi-coloured flags of Soho, past the golds and reds in Chinatown, bumping into tourists as I meander along the river. 

The familiar Starbucks on every corner, like a beacon of energy reminding me to prolong sleep as long as possible - London is awake, and I should be too. 

A weather proof city that looks as beautiful in autumnal sunsets as it does during the vicious December wind. Even the naked trees with their clawed branches greet me. 

I read 'if you're tired of London, you're tired of life'. 

Maybe the answer to being tired isn't always sleep. Instead of closing your eyes, try opening them a bit more, let them really see what's in front of you. I think that's the reason why I love London so much. You can't not see it. 

This multicoloured, multicultural, beautifully hideous city feels like home, because it will accommodate you, whoever you are. Maybe that's why we all love it so much. 

The curse of technology... and the juice that fixes it!

Happy July everyone!

Things have been manic and stressful for me in the past few weeks.

Firstly my laptop was broken so I sent it off to get repaired, which made a significant dent in my already struggling bank account. But what choice do I have? I need the laptop to write; it's my tool.

Then my Dad became ill, got rushed to hospital etc. He's a little better now but it's still worrying.

I've been neglecting my health and not working out as much as I normally do, which has resulted in me feeling quite stuck!

So what now? Well, I decided that a nice cleanse/detox would be best for me. I'm not talking about only drinking lemonade for three days or anything silly. I mean eating only raw vegan for three days (no bread or processed foods), eliminating coffee and alcohol, and drinking lots of green tea! I think it will really help my body to heal from all the stress.

So, day 1. I've had a lemon and ginger tea, and a juice with kale, banana, coconut water, goji berries, pumpkin seeds, sesame seeds, chia seeds, some omega seeds and a little bit of agave nectar. Delicious and bursting with nutrients.

I'm sitting down and sorting out the thousands of things that I need to do today, here's hoping I get it all finished!!

More exciting blog posts to come soon... watch this space...

xoxo